Dear Me, I Am Truly Sorry….

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A letter to myself, dear me, i am truly sorryDear Me,

What can I say, I am truly sorry.

Sorry for all the times I pushed you down and told you you couldn’t, that you weren’t good enough.

Sorry for all those days I made you feel unworthy and isolated and kept you from joining in.

Sorry for all the moments I spoke harshly to you. Saying things I would never dream of saying to my friends.

You didn’t deserve any of it.

You needed a friend and a cheerleader and I have been neither of those. I have been a disapproving cloud of negativity, raining on your parade.

There were times when you really wanted to go for something, and all you needed was a little belief and support from me and I just couldn’t bring it. So you stayed in your box and you dreamed of a day when you would be seen, really seen.

There were moments when someone made you feel wonderful – and instead of letting you bask in that glow I convinced you it was all a lie, ‘how could anyone ever think that of you’, I sneared. ‘Don’t believe them, don’t trust them.’

And all the while I gave my undying support and my love to others instead of you, never you.

I gazed adoringly at others, some undeserving, never you.

Well no more.

I see you now,
I really see you.
And I am here.

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With you, every step of the way.
A friend, a cheerleader, a confidante.

I am here.

We are unstoppable now.

Love,
Me.

D. Ashworth LPIO 2017

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