I hope they will remember that Mummy tried…
Like, really tried.
I woke up every day with the will and the determination to be THE BEST MUM EVER. I really did. Some days I got there…often in fact…there were cakes baked, models built, lots of giggles had and everything was remembered and ticked off.
Some days, I just couldn’t get it right; there were tears, yours and mine, arguments, squabbles and TV, lots of TV.
And you know something?
On those days when I was winning at parenting, you guys were fine and all that, you seemed to have fun, you seemed happy you had everything you needed in life – but you didn’t seem to notice the effort or the work that went in.
Yet, on the days when I just couldn’t – when the dinners were freezer-dive-beige eaten on our laps and the TV was on a loop; you snuggled in and said things like, ‘this is the best day ever Mummy.’
And I was always amazed at that.
Then.
Looking back I can see that you only really ever need me – my time, my closeness, my love.
Just me.
So, when you think about your childhood and especially when you look at your own kids, I hope, with all my hopes, that you remember how hard I tried.
Because I did.
And I hope you feel that I did okay.
You were loved.
You are so very loved.
Donna Ashworth
LPIO 2018
